Immortals 2011 Movie Scene Henry Cavill as Theseus holding the Epirus Bow

Immortals [2011]

Immortals, we’ll put their name to the test. As you can already guess, Immortals is a fantasy action movie in the vein of 300 focusing more on the stylish visuals than the story or characters. The end result is a visually stunning and authentic movie you really don’t care much about. An eye candy you’re going to forget all about as soon as it’s finished. Although Henry Cavill’s abs might stay with you for a long time, depending on your preferences, of course. The cast did their best to bring to life these gods and demigods. However, there’s only so much you can do with a script like this.

This is the first movie for two Greek brothers, Charley and Vlas Parlapanides and I sadly have to say that it shows. Still, there’s enough meat on the bones here to warrant a viewing. Greek mythology is so rich and open to interpretation that no matter how you adapt it, it’s going to work. Well, it’s going to work in some form or another. Especially under the direction of Tarsem Singh who brought us such visually creative movies like The Cell and The Fall. And we can add Immortals to that list as another cinematographic eye candy.

And just to be perfectly clear, Immortals is not an artsy meditation on the values of Greek mythology but a classic fantasy action movie. What I meant to say is that it’s not Darren Aronofsky’s The Fountain, for example. It does look a bit childish at times but also quite brutal towards the end. The final battle is one of the better ones I have ever seen with quite a lot of graphic violence and gore. It’s definitely worth the wait. Plus, it’s in slow motion so you can clearly see all the gruesome details. The initial budget for the movie was $75 million and without big stars, most of it went towards the special effects and sets. 

King Hyperion hungry for power has declared war on humanity. The gods know this, but they cannot interfere with human affairs (yeah right, but they can fuck our women, hypocrites), so they choose a mortal man Theseus to fight in the imminent war. The thing that King Hyperion wants is the Epirus bow, created by the god of war Ares, and with that weapon, he can lay waste to any opposition. Theseus must stop him, but he’s not alone, there’s a thief Stavros, and priestess Phaedra, and the three of them will try to fight the hordes of Hyperion…

Isn’t it funny that all of these fantasy movies have basically the same story? There’s this guy that’s really good but then he gets captured by a bad guy. He vows revenge, usually because his parents were killed, and then forms a party. You have your thief, your sorcerer if this is a sword and sorcery movie and others. And then all of their adventure toward that final battle. I mean this is basically the plot of Immortals but also Conan The Barbarian and many other movies. Speaking of which, I wonder why we didn’t get any weird creatures from Greek mythology here.

Perhaps the money ran out but I think if you already have gods coming to Earth and magic bows, why not have a couple of big beasts like in Clash of the Titans? Apart from Henry Cavill, I would also like to single out Freida Pinto for giving another solid performance. She was the right choice for the role of Phaedra, a virgin Oracle who guides Theseus on his quest. Finally, if you’re looking for something epic featuring great storytelling, I recommend you check out the early 2000s classic Troy starring Brad Pitt. 

Director: Tarsem Singh

Writers: Charley Parlapanides, Vlas Parlapanides

Cast: Henry Cavill, Mickey Rourke, Stephen Dorff, Freida Pinto, Luke Evans, John Hurt

Fun Facts: The bull you see in the movie Immortals was a real torture device in the ancient Greece. Brazen Bull essentially cooks people who are trapped in it to death.


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